Studying our patriarchal blessings

In Gospel Doctrine class recently the instructor made an interesting statement. She said that on her mission in Russia the missionaries were not allowed to be out of their apartments after dark. For much of the year the days were short and the nights were long in Russia, and so she had a lot of personal study time. One of the things that she enjoyed studying was her patriarchal blessing. She said that she studied it like she studied the scriptures, and she recommended the same practice to all of us in the class.

The idea intrigued me. I had read my blessing many times, but I had never studied it. So what would happen if I studied my blessing like I do the scriptures - word by word, sentence by sentence, paragraph by paragraph?

And so I have begun a study of my blessing. I will share here only a few thoughts that are generally applicable to all of us and all of our blessings. Much of what I study will be sacred and private and not to be shared publicly. But what the Spirit constrains me to share, I will share. 

I received my blessing from Patriarch Theodore P. Malquist, in Lakewood, California, on 5 August 1969. I was sixteen years old, about to enter my junior year at Lakewood High School. I had been a member of the Church for less than a year.

After stating his authority as a duly ordained patriarch, the very first thing Patriarch Malquist said is the key to my blessing, and is the principle I want to discuss today. He said, "This blessing shall be one which shall be a guiding influence for you all the days of your life, if you will heed the counsel that is contained in this important event in your life." In this single sentence he stated the scope and purpose of my blessing, offered a promise, and outlined the contingency upon which the promise would be fulfilled. While everyone's blessing may not contain this exact sentence, the principle applies to every patriarchal blessing.

Principles

The following are general principles that apply to modern patriarchal blessings:

• The Guide to the Scriptures declares: "Blessings [are] given to worthy Church members by ordained patriarchs. A patriarchal blessing contains the Lord’s counsel for the person receiving the blessing and declares that person’s lineage in the house of Israel." 
• In a letter from the First Presidency to stake presidents, dated 25 June 1958, President David O. McKay stated that a patriarchal blessing is a "statement of the life mission of the recipient, together with such blessings, cautions and admonitions as the patriarch may be prompted to give for the accomplishment of such life’s mission." (First Presidency Letter, 25 June 1958).
• In General Conference in October 1986, Elder Thomas S. Monson taught that a patriarchal blessing is like a Liahona "to give direction to our lives, to mark the hazards to our safety, and to chart the way, even safe passage.... A patriarchal blessing is a revelation to the recipient." He said that a patriarchal blessing is as eternal as is life. "What may not come to fulfillment in this life may occur in the next." He reminded us that a patriarchal blessing "is to be loved. It is to be followed.... Patience may be required as we watch, wait, and work for a promised blessing to be fulfilled." He concluded, "Your patriarchal blessing is your passport to peace in this life."

From these teachings we learn that a patriarchal blessing is a personal revelation to us, similar in many ways to the revelations we read in the Doctrine and Covenants that were addressed to specific indivuduals, such as Olive Cowdry, Martin Harris, Thomas B. Marsh, Hyrum Smith and Joseph Smith. This personal revelation is intended to outline our life's mission and to chart a path that, if followed, will enable us to fulfill that mission and return to Heavenly Father.

Key Phrases

As I examine the opening sentence in my blessing, key phrases jump out at me.

• "Guiding influence"
• Guiding means to  "direct the course of action".
• Influence means the "effect on behavior, character and development; the power to shape policy."
• Thus, this blessing is intended to direct the course of action in my life by affecting my behavior, character and development and by shaping the policies that govern my decisions.
• My blessing is a prophecy, but not a limitation. If I let it guide me, it will lead me into paths that will expand and ennoble my life. 
• I can exceed my blessing. It tells me the minimum that I can accomplish, not the maximum. If I use the guiding principles in my blessing properly, it will lead me into greater things than are stated in the blessing.
• "All the days of your life"
• This blessing applies to my entire life. I will never outgrow it. I should be careful not to disregard sections of it or assume that I have accomplished some aspect of my blessing and now it is done. 
• Rather than try to figure out if I have accomplished some particular thing that is stated in my blessing, I should assume that I can continue growing in every area outlined in my blessing. These are things that Heavenly Father wants me to be continuously concerned about and actively pursuing.
• "Heed the counsel"
• God knows the end from the beginning. He knows my weaknesses. He knows where I need to focus at every juncture of my life. He knows I am going to fail in many ways and at many times. My blessing says to keep going, to keep trying, to keep seeking counsel and guidance, to not give up on myself.
• I need to pay attention to the advice and recommendations stated in my blessing.
• I need to look more deeply into my blessing. I cannot take it all literally or at face value. Just as the scriptures are a Urim and Thummim to open my mind to deeper things of the Spirit than are written on the page, my blessing, which is scripture to me, can also be a Urim and Thummim.
• A blessing is most valuable when we strive to consciously follow its direction and look for ways to engage ourselves in the activities about which it talks. 
• My blessing is not so much a gauge by which to measure whether I have made good decisions as it is a series of signposts on which I should fix my sights and by which I should conduct my decisions. 
• I should pray each day for the Holy Ghost to direct me to align myself with my blessing.
• "If"
• This may be the single most important word in my blessing. The word if appears three times in my blessing, indicating that the results are conditioned upon my responses and diligence.
• A patriarchal blessing is not a promise. It is more like a contract or covenant. If we fulfill out part of the contract, the Lord offers us benefits and opportunities. If we do not keep our part of the agreement, he has no obligation according to the terms of the contract.

Scriptures

The following scriptures provide valuable insight into the purpose of patriarchal blessings:

• Gen 48:14-16, 20 - Jacob blessed Ephraim with the birthright blessings. Though Ephraim was younger than Mannasah, Jacob by the spirit of prophecy knew the future of his grandsons and gave them appropriate blessings. His blessings to each of them prepared them to adjust their expectations and to align their wills with the Lord's will for them and their posterity.
  
  Our blessings likewise help us understand what the Lord has in store for us. They are prophecy. But prophecy is conditional. If Ephraim had not remained more faithful than Mannasah, he would had lost his place as the head of the leading tribe of Israel in the Last Days.
• Gen 49 - Jacob blessed all of his sons. "I may tell you that which shall befall you in the last days" (v 1). The blessing to his children was a prophecy. He set them in order and prepared them for the things that would befall them and their posterity in the future. Deeds they had done and choices they had made influenced their future fate. Because of sin, each in turn from the oldest to the youngest forfeited the birthright blessing until it finally fell on Joseph.
  
  We get our patriarchal blessings when we are young, usually before we have had time to commit heinous sins that would disqualify us for the best blessings. As teenagers active in the Church and worthy of receiving a blessing, we are generally on the right path. Our blessings guide us along continual paths of righteousness and show us where valiant choices and diligent efforts can lead us. We generally are not cursed in our blessings, as were the sons of Jacob.That does not mean, however, that our future is assured. Had the sons of Jacob repented and worked hard to improve their lives, they could have exceeded their blessings and lightened their curses. Contrariwise, if we ignore our blessings and the counsel contained therein and drift away from activity and righteousness, we can fall far short of our promised blessings.

Examples and Experiences

I have spent most of my life doing what I wanted to do in my own way, and then looked at my blessing and tried to discern if I made good choices based on whether promises in my blessing have occurred in my life. Some have turned out very well. For example:

"You shall find a very choice young lady, how also loves our Heavenly Father. You shall be permitted to take her to that special place, the House of the Lord, and there be married and sealed not only for time but for all eternity. You shall find that this marriage shall be one which shall be filled with love and confidence towards each other."

I know that I was inspired to choose Evelyn for my wife. The Spirit confirmed it to me before we got engaged. Our years together have proven the correctness of my choice as she has indeed become a choice lady, and our marriage is filled with love and confidence.

Some have turned out no so well. About my mission my blessing states: 

"you shall find that it will be easy for you to make contact with non-members. Because of the special, humble, clean way that you have, you shall be able to deliver the message unto them, and shall see many join the church; and have the privilege of entering the waters of baptism with them and seeing them receive true joy in their lives."

This does not describe my missionary service at all. Rather than consider this counsel and figure out what my special, humble, clean way could be that would make it easier for me to contact non-members and deliver the gospel message to them, I just went through the motions for two years, made no real effort to improve myself, and experienced just the opposite of what my blessing stated would be my results.

Conclusion

For most of my life I have not used my blessing as a guide and an influence, but as a measuring stick. Instead of using it to look forward, I have used it only to look back. I made life decisions with little regard for the counsel in my blessing and then measured my results against the promises in my blessing to see if I guessed correctly. That is not how a blessing is to be used.

A patriarchal blessing is not a rear-view mirror. It is a lens for looking forward with clarity and insight. It is not to be filed away, but to be used.

My counsel is, to those who do not have a patriarchal blessing, get one; to those who have one, read it, often. And more than read it, study it. Ask Heavenly Father to reveal its meaning to you through the Holy Ghost. Just as the scriptures change for us as we mature, seek, and learn, so our blessings will be a constant source of enlightenment if we seek it. The words on the page will not change, but their meaning will grow as we grow in knowledge and faith. 

  

O God, where art thou?

"Adversity is inevitable, misery is optional."

The premier example of enduring adversity is the Prophet Joseph Smith in Liberty jail. Just two days after a mob of 200 armed brigands massacred seventeen Latter-day Saint men and boys at Hahn's Mill, Missouri authorities arrested Joseph Smith and about twenty other leaders of the Church. Joseph and his cohort, under constant threat of death, were marched from one location to another over the course of a few weeks until they arrived at the jail house in Liberty. Eventually most of his companions were released, leaving Joseph and six others incarcerated in the cold, damp basement cell of the jail house. For six months Joseph and the others languished in the miserable conditions of their cramped prison cell while the Missouri mobs attacked, murdered, burned and drove the Saints out of the state under threat of extermination.

From this horrible and heart-wrenching situation, in the middle of March, 1839, the Prophet pleaded with the Lord for relief for himself and his beloved saints. He recorded his pleadings and the answer he received from the Lord in a letter dated 20 March, 1839. This letter later was added to the Doctrine and Covenants as sections 121 and 122.

Prayer

Section 121 begins with Joseph's pleadings with the Lord. As he records his prayer, he pleads for the beleaguered saints who have been mobbed and driven from their homes. He calls for God's vengeance against their enemies. Despite his own personal circumstances, which were surely hard to bear, his pleadings were for his friends.

When I read these verses, however, I am wont to personalize them for myself. Here is how I might read this passage and liken it unto myself:

"O God, where art thou? And where is the pavilion that covereth thy hiding place? How long shall thy hand be stayed, and thine eye, yea thy pure eye, behold from the eternal heavens my wrongs, and thine ear be penetrated with my cries? Yea, O Lord, how long shall I suffer these wrongs and unlawful oppressions, before thine heart shall be softened toward me, and thy bowels be moved with compassion toward me? O Lord God Almighty, maker of heaven, earth, and seas, and of all things that in them are, and who controllest and subjectest the devil, and the dark and benighted dominion of Sheol—stretch forth thy hand; let thine eye pierce; let thy pavilion be taken up; let thy hiding place no longer be covered; let thine ear be inclined; let thine heart be softened, and thy bowels moved with compassion toward me. Let thine anger be kindled against my enemies; and, in the fury of thine heart, with thy sword avenge me of my wrongs. Remember my suffering, O my God; and I will rejoice in thy name forever." (see D&C 121:1-6)

To Joseph's credit, he was more concerned about his people's afflictions than his own. Nevertheless, we all feel oppressed from time to time, either for ourselves or for those we love who are suffering. This is a model prayer for each of us. Note that Joseph did not ask the Lord "why", he only asked "when". He acknowledged God's infinite power. He trusted that God would eventually right the wrongs and redeem the righteous. He just wanted to know when the help would come.

Enduring Well

The Lord heard Joseph's prayer and answered him with words of comfort, and in that answer, he gave us keys to successfully enduring our afflictions:

"My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment; And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes." (D&C 121:7-8)

First, God reminds Joseph of the eternal perspective by which all of our trials should be viewed. Hard times are usually just a small part of life. But even if they last a life-time, it is still only a small moment in the eternities in which we live. During our mortal probation, there may seem to be no end to our challenges and problems, but God assures us that there is an end to them, and once the trials are passed, there is an eternity of blessings awaiting us.

Second, the Lord commands Joseph to "endure it well." What does it mean to endure well? An example is the grandmother of one of the sisters in my ward. Racked with cancer at the end of her life, she chose to rise above self-pity and despair. When people came to visit and comfort her, she more often than not comforted her visitors. She remained cheerful and positive. Her family and friends felt better for having been in her presence. She was more concerned about others than about herself. That is enduring well.

Gratitude

Joseph was reminded that even in his worse trials, he could still be grateful:

"Thy friends do stand by thee, and they shall hail thee again with warm hearts and friendly hands." (D&C 121:9).

When things look dark and hopeless, look around. There are still good things in life. We must not become so consumed by the afflictions of our trials that we miss the blessings that are around us.

Justice

Though life may seem unfair at the moment, there will ultimately be justice.

"And they who do charge thee with transgression, their hope shall be blasted, and their prospects shall melt away as the hoar frost melteth before the burning rays of the rising sun;" (D&C 121:11)

Right will triumph in the end. There will be justice, but thankfully there is also mercy. Let justice take its course - focus on mercy.

God Sees All

We can be assured that God sees our troubles and is aware of our needs.

"Behold, mine eyes see and know all their works, and I have in reserve a swift judgment in the season thereof, for them all;" (D&C 121:24).

God sees everyone's works. He sees ours as well as those who wrong us or cause us pain. He knows the whole story. We do not. We must not get tunnel vision.

Gifts of Knowledge

Joseph received a surprising promised related to his suffering:

"God shall give unto you knowledge by his Holy Spirit, yea, by the unspeakable gift of the Holy Ghost, that has not been revealed since the world was until now;" (D&C 121:26)

What does enduring affliction have to do with receiving knowledge? We must be tried before we can receive certain gifts. The gift may have nothing to do with the trial. Perhaps the knowledge we will receive will explain why we had the trial. Regardless, if we pass the test and endure well those things the Lord calls us to endure, he promises us sweet knowledge through the "unspeakable gift of the Holy Ghost". As trials humble us, we draw nearer to the Lord's Spirit, and that Spirit can teach us all things.

Mysteries of God

As we grow in knowledge of spiritual things, we will grow in the power of revelation.

"All thrones and dominions, principalities and powers, shall be revealed and set forth upon all who have endured valiantly for the gospel of Jesus Christ." (D&C 121: 26)

Enduring valiantly with faith in Christ is the price of admission into the mysteries of God.

God Always Prevails

God is all powerful, and he will exercise that power in our behalf.

"How long can rolling waters remain impure? What power shall stay the heavens? As well might man stretch forth his puny arm to stop the Missouri river in its decreed course, or to turn it up stream, as to hinder the Almighty from pouring down knowledge from heaven upon the heads of the Latter-day Saints." (D&C 121:33)

God's will will prevail, so we might as well get on the boat and enjoy the ride. He wants ever so much to give us knowledge. We just need to qualify and apply.

God Is With Us

In the midst of our trials we may feel alone, unsustained and unloved. But the Lord promised Joesph that he was never alone.

"And although their influence shall cast thee into trouble, and into bars and walls, thou shalt be had in honor; and but for a small moment and thy voice shall be more terrible in the midst of thine enemies than the fierce lion, because of thy righteousness; and thy God shall stand by thee forever and ever." (D&C 122: 4)

Having trials does not mean that God has abandoned us. He was always with Joseph, even while he was suffering in Liberty jail. He is with us in even our worst of trials. He is never far away.

Trials With a Purpose

Joseph was told that no matter how black things seemed to get, there was purpose behind them.

"And if thou shouldst be cast into the pit, or into the hands of murderers, and the sentence of death passed upon thee; if thou be cast into the deep; if the billowing surge conspire against thee; if fierce winds become thine enemy; if the heavens gather blackness, and all the elements combine to hedge up the way; and above all, if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good." (D&C 122:7)

Years ago when I taught a teenage Sunday school class, I had my class memorize this verse, and we repeated it at the beginning of every class. It became our theme. Teenagers have lots of trials ahead of them. Having this verse as an anchor to their souls was important in helping them weather the storms of life. This is a powerful promise to all of us who remain faithful and endure our trials well.

Jesus Is Our Example

The Lord reminded Joseph that no matter how hard things got, they were never as hard for Joseph as they  were for Christ.

"The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Art thou greater than he?" (D&C 122:8)

There is great comfort in knowing that there is nothing we can suffer that Christ has not suffered. He has suffered for us and with us. He knows exactly how we feel because he has felt it. We should not expect to be exempt from trials because the Savior was not exempt.

Limits

Though they may feel like it sometimes, if we are faithful, our trials and afflictions are not limitless.

"Therefore, hold on thy way, and the priesthood shall remain with thee; for their bounds are set, they cannot pass. Thy days are known, and thy years shall not be numbered less; therefore, fear not what man can do, for God shall be with you forever and ever." (D&C 122:9)

We will not be tried or tempted above what we are able to bear. God knows our limits, and if the trial continues, it means God knows we can endure it.

Examples and Experiences

Many trials are too painful or too personal or too sacred to talk about. In fact, our greatest trials are often highly personalized. There is an old adage that if everyone could take off their trials like their shoes and throw them in a pile and could pick any other set of trials in the pile, everyone would pick up their own trials because they just fit them so well. The Lord designed them that way.

Without revealing personal details about some of my greatest trials, I'll just say that I have learned some valuable lessons about being a parent as I have endured challenges that have come to me through my children:

1. Do whatever you have to do to keep your relationship with your children.
2. Do your best and then you let them live their lives. You can ache for them, but you cannot own their choices and problems.
3. The atonement heals not only the damage we do to ourselves but the damage that others do to us.

Conclusion

Why did God allow Joseph to suffer in Liberty jail? He was innocent of wrong-doing. He was trying his best to be obedient and live the gospel. If ever there was a righteous individual who deserved blessings from the Lord, it was Joseph Smith. Yet instead of an easy life, he had trial after trial, affliction after affliction. His experience seems so counter-intuitive to the teachings that we all repeat in Sunday school - if we keep the commandments, we will be blessed.

Perhaps the Lord allowed the injustice of the Prophet's incarceration just so he could write sections 121 & 122 and we could take his word for it. Perhaps we need to know that he knew what suffering was about. He was not writing from an ivory tower, but from the pit of despair.

We each will have our Gethsemane experience. It may not be imprisonment or persecution, but we must each be wrung out to our own bitter dregs. The Lord wants to prove what we are made of. We find solace and hope in the words that God gave to Joseph in his darkest hour: "The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Art thou greater than he?" (D&C 122:8)